Ladies and gentlemen, we have a real scandal on our hands! It seems that everyones favourite bent as fuck hedge fund mogul Ken Griffin is suing the IRS and Treasury Department for “unlawful disclosure” of his tax information. Can you believe the Chutzpah of this absolute cunt?
According to a complaint filed in a Florida federal court, Mayo Boy Ken Griffin is suing the IRS for violating its “legal obligations” to protect his information and failing to establish “appropriate administrative, technical, or physical safeguards” over its record system. But let’s not forget, this is the same Ken Griffin whose done absolutely everything he can to obfuscate, lie and cheat retail for years.
Let’s remember, when billionaires like Ken Griffin donate millions of dollars to lawmakers, you just know they aren’t doing it out of the kindness of their hearts. Nope…they’re buying influence. Tell me i’m wrong?!?
And get this – Griffin even went as far as to spend $54 million opposing an Illinois ballot measure that would have increased his state tax bill by over $50 million per year.
But don’t worry, Griffin wants us to know that he’s “proud of his success” and has always “sought to pay his fair share of taxes.” Sure, Ken, but you’ve also managed to rig the fucking markets, and you paying off a few million in tax (and bribes) doesn’t mean shit when you’re doing everything you can to screw over retail, eh?
In his lawsuit, Griffin claims that IRS personnel “exploited” their own failures to establish adequate safeguards for tax return information and “misappropriated” his confidential tax information, which was then “unlawfully disclosed” to ProPublica for publication. The IRS and Treasury have yet to comment on the matter.
But fear not, dear Apes. Mayo-Hoarder Ken wants us to know that he’s taking on the IRS to protect Americans’ privacy and to ensure that similar leaks don’t happen to anyone else in the future. Yes, because it’s not about protecting his own reputation or trying to cover up any potential dirt in his tax returns. No, no. It’s all about the greater good.
In the end, it’s just another day in the life of Ken Griffin, always finding ways to come out on top. What a knob jockey.